Searching for mistakes in emails race
formality/ opening and closing emails/ cultural training/ paragraphing
Work in groups of two or three with one worksheet per group. Cover the whole worksheet with a book or piece of paper (or change the text to white if you are working on a computer). When your teacher tells you to, uncover just Text A and race to find one mistake in it. It could be any kind of mistake (of paragraphing, grammar, politeness, etc). Raise your hand when you think you have found it. You will get one point if you are right, but can’t guess again for that text if you are wrong (at least until all the other groups have guessed too). Make sure that you look for things which are wrong, not just things which could be better or could be different.
Do the same text by text, not looking at the next text until your teacher tells you to.
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Text A
Hi John
How’re things? Busy as usual?
Are you still okay for Friday evening? Will try to give you a call tomorrow to check.
Speak to you then.
Yours sincerely
Alex
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Text B
Dear Mr Jones
With reference to your letter of the 17 January, please accept our apologies for the mistake. You can rest assured that we will make sure that it does not happen again.
We will deliver 100 new items free of charge by the end of next week, if that is acceptable with you. Please let us know as soon as possible if that is okay, and we can put the order through for you straightaway to save any further delay.
The mistake happened because of communication problems with one of our suppliers, but we have now fully fixed this problem.
If you have any further questions, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours sincerely
Alex Case
Director of Sales
TEFLtastic Plastics
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Text C
Dear Sir/ Madam:
I am very interested in the job of Technical Assistant to the Assistant Technician as it is a natural step forward from my present position and would allow me to utilize the knowledge I have gained through my MSc. studies.
I think I would be suitable for the job as I have lots of experience in the field of advertising and am a motivated and sociable employee, as you can see in the attached CV. Although they were in different fields, I have also worked as an assistant in two part-time jobs.
I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours faithfully,
A.M. Case (Mr)
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Text D
Dear Dr. MacDonald,
Thank you for the letter of 12 March.
We regret to inform you there is some additional information that we had asked for that which was not enclosed with the letter. We would be very grateful if you could send us the documents listed below as soon as possible.
Firstly, could you send us the results of the blood analysis for the first quarter of this year? Secondly, we would appreciate it if you could send medical records for the 50 to 60 age group as well as the over 60s. Finally, would it be possible for you to type out a brief biography of the members of staff involved in the research for the in-house magazine?
Thank you in advance.
Yours sincerely,
A. Case, PhD (Oxon.)
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Text E
Dear Lord Mountbatten
I hope you and your family are well and that the recent flooding has not affected you too much.
I was saddened to hear about the death of your champion race horse and was wondering if I could be of any assistance. Please find a pamphlet of our services attached.
Yours sincerely
Alexander Case
Managing Director
Fido’s Pet Funeral Parlour
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Text F
Dear Mr Phalang
With reference to your email of 16 September, please see the comments below. The numbering system relates to the questions in your email.
- Yes
- Your data is incomplete
- Please recheck the delivery times provided by your local suppliers. These times are not acceptable.
- We did not request this information. Please provide only the information requested.
- A local supplier of this key component is not possible. We propose using German equipment to guarantee quality.
If you have any further questions, please do not hesitate to contact us.
Best regards
Alex Case
Which of the mistakes in the English emails above could be because of cultural differences?
Suggested answers
Text A
“Yours sincerely” is too formal for this email. It should be something like “Best wishes”, “Yours, “CU” or “All the best” to match the casualness/ friendliness of the rest of the email.
Text B
Paragraphs 2 and 3 are in the wrong order. You should give the reason for something happening before the action promised.
Text C
There should be an opening line at the beginning saying why the person is writing, something like “I am writing to apply for the position of Technical Assistant to the Assistant Technician advertised on Techtech.com on 25 April (Reference number TA 23).”
Text D
“We regret to inform you…” is the wrong function, as they are complaining politely rather than giving bad news. “Unfortunately…” would be better.
Text E
The email needs a closing line, something like “Please contact me at any time if you need any help”.
Text F
The email is too abrupt and direct for this situation. It needs to be written in full sentences and proper paragraphs, probably without numbering/ bullet points and with phrases like “You also asked…” instead.
The mistakes in texts B, C, D, E and F could have been made for cultural reasons.
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Related pages
Alternative error correction techniques and materials
Over 300 pages of other emailing materials, including a polished up version of this worksheet and over 70 pages on avoiding typical emailing mistakes, available here.
